Simple Solutions To Troublesome Toddler Behaviors
Although the statement might sound unusual, there is a place for aggressive behavior in our
society. New parents might even be shocked to find out we should consider it reasonable when
it comes from our toddlers. Remember, these fledgling adults are learning skills that will make
them part of society and the frustration associated with developing language skills alone can be
one of the reasons they are often guilty of aggressive or unacceptable acts.
Add a fierce need to be independent and impulse control skills that are far from mature and even
what would normally be considered completely unacceptable behaviors like biting and hitting can
be viewed in a new light by parents who understand these are just normal reactions to growing
pains. Of course, that doesn’t mean these kinds of behaviors should be overlooked by parents
who want to raise responsible people. It’s important children at any age understand prolonged
aggressive behavior is unacceptable and you can help them to express their feelings in positive
and decent ways with the following ideas.
• Try instilling the notion of consequences for the actions. Younger children don’t usually
learn the art of reason or empathy until they are at least four or five, so the best you
can hope for is having your toddler grasp the consequences for their bad behavior. That
means taking them out of a game where they’ve been acting out and letting them know
they can join the other children again when they don’t behave badly without explaining
too much about how they’ve made the other children feel.
• Consistency works wonders. Setting up a simple pattern the toddler understands is
much more effective than trying to explain situations to them. For example, telling them
to, ‘Wait for your turn on the swing,’ in a calm, reasonable tone is much better than
scolding them. If you do this often enough over a period of time, your child will make the
• Don’t react. Toddlers are notorious for saying things that can provoke an adult style
argument if you don’t show restraint. So, when your two or three year old yells at you,
it’s best to respond with a positive affirmation that teaches the child he or she won’t get
a reaction. Telling them you still love them no matter how many times they say they
hate you is the best way to keep your blood pressure down while teaching them about
Finally, remember toddlers often act out to get attention. That means when they’re holding their
breath or throwing a tantrum, these little folks are also paying attention to see what kind of
reaction they’re getting from you. Sometimes the best solution is to ignore the bad behavior and
reinforce the good. You’ll need to be consistent with this approach since you’re always being
watched carefully and if they think they can budge you, your toddler will act out again and again
until they’re sure there’s no way you’ll react. Praising them when they act appropriately offers a
new set of alternatives they can explore.
For more interesting articles like this, visit All My Children Daycare.
Author: Rob Starr